Intimacy, Relationship, Focused Prpose: Bualancing passion, purpose and relationship for an abundant life!
-Maria Gauci, LMT, Portland, OR
Three Chairs
It's kind of like that old adage that the best conversations are the ones you have with yourself. The Three Chairs exercise is an opportunity to generate powerful and insightful internal dialogue to gain new information, analyze new ideas and perspectives, and open up previously blocked areas of your internal self. By separating out the different components and voices inside of you it becomes easier to get a clearer channel directly into that aspect. What this often brings up is a specific message or discovery about what is working and what isn't inside of you.
Begin by identifying three different areas to sit or stand during this exercise. You will move between each physical space as a way of shifting into that role. The first space will be your internal coach, the second your internal client and the third will be the neutral observer. The coach and the client can also be identified as two different aspects of yourself (e.g. Inner adult and inner child, inner critic and inner poet, etc.) as it's appropriate for the dialogue being addressed.
In the coach position the individual asks the client questions that are direct, powerful, positively focused, don't ask the question "why", and move the client forward to direct and immediate answers and actions.
In the client position the individual looks deep for answers, responds with honesty and clarity, and moves to results and action.
In the observer position the individual can see into the heart and mind of both the coach and client to notice what is happening with each as well as in the dynamic created. The observer is also a non-involved position that can notice what is working or not working for both the coach and client.
Begin by identifying a subject to be addressed in the exercise and then step into the coach position. The coach will begin by asking the client a question. The individual is moved between the three positions as needed by another person guiding the exercise but not directly involved. The guide notices when the individual is moving forward and responding as needed and when they are not. The observer role is used to help the individual see different aspects, call out behavior that is unsupportive or self-sabotaging, and bring both coach and client back to task.
Typical results of this exercise include a more powerful inner dialogue
leading to significant results, a greater awareness of which part of the
individual needs more attention or support, and deeply revealing answers
to difficult questions.